Home Is Where There Is A Vuitton

Living as an expat means that you are very likely to change the town where you are living every two or three years. At least if your are young and you want to see the world.

This is fun but brings up a problem most people don´t have to deal with, change of the standard of living. One year you might be living in buzzing NYC with all it´s possibilities to spend your hard earned buck and the next you are living in some third world country which is up and coming for some reason where you have to worry not to get kidnapped, mugged or that the water which is coming out of the tab might not be as healthy as you wish.

So you need some kind of indicator how far developed a city is. I don´t only mean the infrastructure but also the people who are living there. You can live in a very save very nice little town in the middle of Bavaria where you don´t have to worry about a thing but boredom will sooner or later get the best of you and you are considering hanging yourself with a Hermes belt from a beam in your costly restored 18th century timbered house.

I am spoiled, easily bored, ignorant, superficial and lusting for entertainment so being stranded somewhere where there is one pub where the farmers are drowning their sorrows in alcohol is like a death sentence to me. I love to go clubbing, hanging out at nice bars with some friends, shopping at nice stores and I like to be surrounded by sophisticated people so I found the perfect indicator if a city is suiting my needs.

Louis Vuitton stores. Vuitton is like the Mc Donalds of luxury, come to think of it most of the places I have been to, a Mc Donalds is not far from the Vuitton store. Anyway, Vuitton caters to a certain clientele, people who want style, people who want to have fun, people who make a statement with their accessories. It´s like "Look, I have this bag, I am part of a certain crowd of people". If they can actually afford to spend that much money on a bag is another story but it´s the mindset of these people I am attracted to. It´s the "I know what I want and I am worth it" mindset.

So if you are a bit like me and you are due for a transfer to a new location, just check the net if there is a Vuitton store.

Mon Dieu!

Original Post: Jezebel

Shoot Me Up

Ten days ago it was my first time. I was a little bit nervous but not scared. He took a good look at me and then asked me to lie down. He prepared the syringe, putting the needle on top and filling it up with the liquid which would take care of my worries and fears. He cleaned my skin and gently sticked the needle into my tissue and pushed the plunger.

I didn´t feel any pain but I heard how the needle cracked into my muscle and he told me I was bleeding a bit. He injecting me four times in total and though I didn´t feel the effect right away, I knew that all would be good for me from now on. He was kind enough to wait until after he was done to ask for the money. I payed him, put on my sunglasses and slipped out of the building hoping that I would not bump into somebody I know seeing my in the state I was in.

And that was the first time I had my forehead injected with Botolinum toxin A also know as Botox a deadly neurotoxin which will kill in high doses and which will paralyze muscles and sweat glands in highly diluted concentrations. If you inject botox into a muscle it will prevent the muscle from moving and by doing so reducing facial expression lines. This effect will last for 6-8 months.
I have the disadvantage of being a smoker (I really should look into that quitting smoking pill), I move my eyebrows and use facial expressions a lot when I talk and I have problems drinking enough water which resulted in premature lines on my forehead which are very hard to get rid of. You should see my daily moisturizing routine, it´s insane but it didn´t help with the lines at all. So the thought of taking little more drastic measures was bouncing around in my head for quite some time. I even titled my birthday party this year "two more years till botox". I guess I lied or simply couldn´t take it anymore. I am vain, I am superficial at times I even have bad hair days so when I don´t like something about myself I change it. I am short sighted so I started wearing contacts when I was 13, I have dark shadows under my eyes so I use concealer, I don´t like wearing colours so I mainly wear black white and grey for over a decade now. Point is if there is anything that you don´t like about yourself you should consider changing it if it makes you feel better. But you should never change something because other people tell you to.

So I was unhappy with my forehead and I had it fixed and ten days after I´m very happy that I did it. Botox needs some time to build up, so the first three days not much happened, after that it got harder and harder to frown and I am completely unable to wrinkle my forehead since two days. I told the doctor that I would like to keep my eyebrows movable since I use them a lot while I talk and I can still use them which is great.

I have to go back in for a touch up next week. The good thing is that my doctor is not that kind of doctor who would shoot you up and sent you on your way, no, he only injects you with half of the usual dosage the first time and adjusts some things at your touch up.
My eyebrows are a tiny bit uneven now which he will take care of during my touch up. It´s a very common side effect since you cannot estimate how the muscles will settle once they are paralyzed. I have to fight the urge to just pluck them so that they are even again. Doing so could end up in a very unpleasant surprise when the final dose kicks in. I could end up looking very Cruella de Ville-ish. So I will simply wait a little.

All in all, I am very happy and can recommend it.
If I find a picture of me which I haven´ t already Photoshoped I will post some before and after pictures later.

Images:Allergan

Happy To Be Right Here Right Now

My last post and a nice chat I had with Kate got me thinking, that I´m really not the person who wishes to be back in High School because it was such a bloody good time. Don´t get me wrong, I didn´t hate it or something but it´s just not worth going back, even if I could.

There were so many things I didn´t know, so many people I haven´t met, so much self esteem I didn´t have, so many drinks I didn´t drink, so many bad choices of clothing I haven´t made, so many hair cuts i haven´t tried, so many times I haven´t stood up for myself.

To put it in simple words, I was simply not as fabulous as I am now.
The case of the past is herewith closed for me.

Class picture 1994. Not so fabulous.


Reunion picture 2008 14 years later. FABULOUS!

Being An Online Social Butterfly

Being an ex-pat means that you have left your hometown and all of your friends behind you, starting from scratch all over again. What would ex-pats do before the invention of the Internet? How would they stay in touch with each other? I simply have no clue. Sure there is always the option of writing letters, but for me personally it never worked out. First my handwriting is really really bad, one could think that I am a doctor with Parkinson. Second I have a very short attention span, meaning that I have trouble focusing on one subject longer than say 10 minutes. There is hardly one movie I can watch without looking stuff up on Wikipedia. Anyway, so no letters for me and I really do apologize to all the people I was in language exchange program with in England to their letters I never replied .

Today with the invention of countless social networking websites it´s so easy to stay in touch with all kinds of people. Hell, some people found me who I was in kindergarden with and have no recollection of whatsoever. In these situations I tend to do what my grandma taught me "if you have no idea, simply smile and fake it" and that´s what I´m doing. Which brings me to my point, do I really want to stay in touch with all these people, is it really helping me of not letting go of the old times? Sure, online networking is great for meeting new people and building a new network in a new town but does it really help to always having the past so easy accessible? I mean do I really want to know what my old classmates are doing, that they have 2.5 kids now, that they didn´t study astrophysics after all, that the guy I had a major crush on in the 8th grade is still drop dead gorgeous minus the hair plus a kid, that my first boyfriend is still a male nurse although he is clever enough to be a doctor, that all the people in the In-Crowd back then are pretty much in the Out-Crowd now?

Memory is a bitch and we know it. Thinking back, it all seemed so easy, so trouble free so blissful, but that´s because memory is a very selective mass storage medium. The good things stay the bad stuff gets right clicked into the trash folder immediately.

Online communities are great fun because they serve our need to know perfectly. Everyone is curious, we all have our Sliver moments, and with these websites we can be a little stalker in the privacy of our own apartment. No shame no blame.

I added up all the connections I have on my 16!!! social networking sites and came up with the amazing number of 523 individuals. So, to how many of these people do I talk on a regular bases? I would say around 30, not more. 20 here in Geneva, 10 back in Germany.

I think that I eventually will deactivate most of the networks which are related to the past since they are simply a hindrance to be focused on the future. Time moves in only one direction and memory lane is simply not in a good neighborhood.

Come to the future, they have cookies. ;)

New Bar In Town - Hans Müller Bar mit Musik

Greg the creator of Calamar, SIP, Demi Lune and Chez Ma Cuisine has opened his new bar in Eaux-Vives last Monday. Curious as I am I went there with a couple of friends yesterday and I must say it was very nice. The concept is pretty much like Calamar in the beginning, before they converted that lovely living room inspired area into a canteen. Since it is so new not everything is finished but you wouldn´t notice it if you weren´t t looking for it. They will start offering snacks from next week on and I am wondering if they will have such lovely burgers like Calamar does.

The interiour is the usual mix of flea market furniture, vintage posters and warm colours. Lounge music is oozing out of the speakers and they are showing old episodes of Derrick, a german who-did-it crime series from the 80´s, on a tv in a corner which generates an instant at home feeling. They have a big terrace outside so I guess it will be fabulous in the summer.

The drinks are yummy, reasonable priced (13 chf for a vodka pomme) and served by Jan a very handsome dutch guy and a very easy on the eyes brit. What more can you ask of.

We will go there again next week and chek out the food.
I guess after forcing all my friends to come to Calamar, which is right around the corner from where I live, it´s payback time for me and I have to make the trip to Eaux-Vives more often in the future.

HANS MÜLLER Bar Mit Musik Rue Henri-Blanvallet 13 EAUX-VIVES open tue-sa from 6pm

The Eternal Hunt For The Right Bag

Being a gentleman of a certain fabulousness I have lots of stuff to carry around to stay fabulous which resulted in the fact that some people tend to call me the "Fag With A Bag". I don´t mind being called that since, to a certain degree, it´s true. What I do mind though is with what kind of bag I am seen with. To understand me a little bit more, let me explain my design theme. I would say that I like to see myself as a not so pretty version of a 1920´s silent movie star rather than a 1980´s neo punk. So my bags need to be black, or a very dark colour, made from either leather or cordura. Those fugly Freitag bags are totally out of the question and I have a thing for designer bags, so the hunt for a new bag is quite challenging.

My trusted Vuitton Yack has reached the age of retirement, they still sell it but it has lasted two season with me and it´s time for a replacement.

In the moment I am tempted to go for a little bit more practical bag since my Yack, why the hell did they gave this beautiful bag this horrible name, doesn´t have a shoulder strap so i have to carry it in one hand all the time. And people who know me, know that i also have my Blackberry in my hand, I smoke and am seen with a martini glass quite often which is quite hard to manage with just two hands at my disposal. The result is that i tend to have my bag dangling from my elbow and I am sorry to say this, but I am not Victoria Beckham and it simply looks way over the top gay. So the next logical step would be a bag with a shoulder strap. These are the bags I prefer the most in the moment.

Y-3 Messenger Bag, Durable woven nylon, Nylon strap with leather shoulder pad; drop adjusts up to 24", Tonal logo screen on the front, Rear zipped pocket, Three interior patch pockets with snap closures and two mesh pouch pockets, 16.25"x 12"x 8". It´s a more sporty kind of bag, so I would rather take it to Bain de Paquis than a night out around town.

Dior Striped Messenger Bag, Logo coated canvas with calfskin leather trim, Polished silver metal hardware, Adjustable nylon shoulder strap with link attachments, Metallic stripe down center, Large front flap with "Dior Homme" embossing along bottom edge. A very nice bag for club and bar hopping.

Fendi Selleria Silver Label Messenger Bag, Selleria calf leather crafted using ancient Roman saddle-making techniques, Signature equestrian topstitching, Woven canvas shoulder strap with link attachments; drop extends up to 30", Perforated Fendi Selleria logo on the front, Patch pocket and cell phone pocket on hanging Zucca print panel, 15.5"x 12.5"x 4.5". All purpose bag, veeeery nice.


Louis Vuitton Damier Géant Canvas Bélier, Jacquard canvas in high tenacity polyamide and polyester, Calf leather trim, Brushed aluminum hardware, Can be used as a sports bag or as a city tote, Large shoulder strap for a comfortable cross-shoulder carry, New closing system with snap locks; functional, secure, and resistant, Exterior side secure pockets with a large capacity, Interior zipped pocket, High tenacity polyamide canvas lining, 19.7" x 9.8" x 6.3". So far this is my favorite bag. Wonderfully multi purpose and very sleek.

I think I will roll a dice or something for my final decision. I will keep you posted.

Images: eluxury

Soundtrack Of My Life - March 2008

Just a list of the songs I play on high rotation in the moment.

Gomez - How We Operate (How We Operate)

Daft Punk - Around The World / Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger (Alive 2007)

Sara Bareilles - Love Song (Little Voice)

Simone White - Beep Beep Song (I Am The Man)

Goldfrapp - Road To Somewhere (Seventh Tree)

Adele - Hometown Glory (19)

Roisin Murphy - You Know Me Better (Overpowered)

Marvin Gaye - Got To Give It Up (The Funk Collection)

Kylie Minogue - 2 Hearts (X)

Fatboy Slim - Right Here Right Now Redanka Mix (The Greatest Hits Remixed)

Alphawezen - Rain (En Passant)

Madonna - 4 Minutes (Hard Candy)

Obsessions - Updating My Facebook Status

Checking my Facebook i realized that I might be updating my status just a little bit too often.

Whenever I have a minute I update my status. A wet dream for every stalker.




These are just the updates of the last two months:

Ulli is updating his blog.
Ulli ´s headache is driving him crazy.
Ulli is vicious right now.
Ulli is hanging out at the Savoy in Zürich.
Ulli is at veeeeery nice club in the moment. He needed that sooooo bad.
Ulli is all excited about the small fire in th restorant he is eating at in the moment. no casualties though...
Ulli is heading to Zürich.
Ulli is blogging.
Ulli loves The Riches.
Ulli is adding more stuff to youtube.
Ulli is clubbing with the gays.
Ulli is in Yverdon les Bang errrr Bains.
Ulli is demanding that you shut up and drive.
Ulli "Where i come from we don't play around".
Ulli is going to the car show tonight.
Ulli is fighting his addiction to nasal spray. Day two and about to suffocate...
Ulli is particular?! No shit!!
Ulli is on his way back after a very delightful lunch with the husband.
Ulli ´s secret agent training school lectures include "Dressing to Kill" by Barbie, and "The many outfits of subversion" by Ken.
Ulli is at dancing class. FAME, I WANNA LIVE FOREVER....
Ulli is looking for his MOJO.
Ulli is going to sing now....
Ulli "where is my straw? It is snowing!".
Ulli thinks that quitting smoking for good might be more effective than botoxing his face into a mask.
Ulli wants photoshop in real live on the fly.
Ulli is calling it a night.
Ulli is up already. something is wrong here.
Ulli is blissfully hammered. FABULOUS
Ulli had a lovely birthday party.
Ulli is power napping. ZZZZZZZZ.
Ulli is officially 28 now.
Ulli is driving to Lausanne with Ruth.
Ulli is looking foward to Ruth´s arrival.
Ulli is terrified of anything involving "Volksmusik".
Ulli is going to bed. Good night.
Ulli is relevant y´all.
Ulli is at Bypass. Drinking on a school night. YAY.
Ulli is amazed by the number of people being able of speaking German here in Geneva.
Ulli is an ENFJ.
Ulli is considering not being punctual as extremly rude. Waste your own time, not mine.
Ulli is indulging the bubbly.
Ulli is doing the usual Saturday routine yet again.
Ulli really needs to kick that nasty oxygen habit he has.
Ulli is sleeping upside down in a corner,draped in his wings until the sun goes down.
Ulli is bar hopping. YAY.
Ulli demands a knitting needle. MUAHAHAHAHAHA.
Ulli knows that he is weird.
Ulli is totally happening.
Ulli ´s an insomniac.
Ulli is so freakin' fabulous, Lynn just cannot believe it.
Ulli is at a chinese new year party.
Ulli is updating his status way too often. Right now he is getting a haircut.
Ulli is in a backing up and encrypting frenzy.
Ulli is a walking and talking garlic bomb.
Ulli is soon stuffing his face with YUMMY greek food.
Ulli is in the waiting line.
Ulli is VOGUE!
Ulli is happy that he found the perfect location for his birtday party.
Ulli is surprised how boring american football is.
Ulli is trying to figure out american football rules. He is watching the Superbowl for the first time ever.
Ulli is at Lady Godiva.
Ulli is wondering what to do tonight.
Ulli is lasergaming.
Ulli is prepared a very nice chilli con carne for tonight.
Ulli is lunching with Tiggs. Thai food, YUMMY!
Ulli is yummy yummy.
Ulli hates those annoying facebook apps that want me to spam my friends
Ulli wants a pet cheetah.
Ulli is in sunday hibernation.



OOOOPS!!

Obsessions - Blackberry

Being the communication junkie I am, I of course have a smartphone, a Blackberry Curve to be precise and I must say I am totally obsessed with this little gadget. Being able to stay in touch with all of my friends and being able to gather information on any given subject in a matter of seconds is simply wonderful and highly addictive.

Before I came to Geneva I used normal cell phones, slightly more sophisticated, but I was happy. Coming to Geneva with all those corporate slaves with their little Blackberries being able to have their emails in their pockets made me crave for one of these neat little thingies really bad.

I have my Blackberry for nearly a year now and I would never ever go back to a regular cell phone, besides I am no longer able to type messages on a normal keypad. It takes ages since I am so used to the full QWERTY keyboard of the Curve.

If you are a social butterfly, a BB is the tool for you. Facebook, MSN Messenger, Aim, ICQ, Google Talk, Skype, BB Messenger, Yahoo Messenger, Google maps to find your way to that party, mobile blogging simply everything is in there and you can even play videos in a very good quality if you are waiting for the tram or play a little bit of poker if a party is a tad boring. Everyone will think that you are simply busy maintaining your network.

The bad thing is that I am so hooked on the BB that it is hardly more than a meter away from where I am. It sits on my nighstand when I sleep, a bomb could explode right next to me and I wouldn´t wake up, the vibrating sound of the BB wakes me up without a problem though, that´s how conditioned I am , sad I know. I take a shower, the BB is on the sink, when i am out and about I have the BB in my hand most of the time. Maybe I have commitment issues or something but I feel lost and alone when I don´t have my Curve in my hand when I am out, there could always be another party, a friend in need of help or simply an interesting email I could miss.

I think I have to work on that issue and I really have to get the thought of encrusting that thing in black rhinestones out of my head.

Fear No More The Winter Is Over, Not Quite Yet

When I said that the winter was over i really believed it. Boy was I wrong. It has been snowing and raining for three days on and off and I am really considering hiding in my atomic shelter, which 90% of the houses here in Switzerland have, until it´s over. But there is hope, it is supposed to be nicer by the end of the week.

I am trying to get myself out of the house to do some grocery shopping for over 4 hours now and I think it will not happen today. I guess it will be frozen Lasagne for the hubby tonight. Poor thing but I am really not in the mood to leave the house.

Fear No More The Winter Is Over

As lovely as Geneva might be, it can be very depressing in the winter, especially if you are not into winter sports. This was my third winter here in Geneva and I am so happy that it is finally over. I am so done with these dark and grey days where you need a cattle prod to simple get yourself out of the bed and up and running. It´s a bit funny, I love snow, I love to walk on fresh snow, hear the crunching sound it makes. Who would have thought that Geneva doesn´t get much of that, but rain, well there is a lot of it in the winter here.

A good indicator that the winter is over is the massage man. He is a part of Geneva like the jet d´eau, rich Arabs in the summer and the lust for high end watches you get after living here for a while. During the summer he seems to have his headquaters at the Bain des Paquis where he offers massages to the sun craving people who hang out there. You can´t miss him, he wears nothing than his teeny tiny thong, flip flops and lots of tattoos. He seems to be a Hippie who has missed his connection flight to Goa and is stranded here. I have never seen him in the winter and I have never seen him fully dressed.

When I was out with a friend last Saturday, it happened. While I was trying to get through L´Usine he appeared out of nowhere right in front of me. You cannot imagine how happy I was seeing him, I could have hugged him although I would never touch him in fear of the Hippie Virus which turns you into an alternative sun child and I don´t want that to happen.

Anyway, seeing him is an indicator that the winter is over and spring is here. So I survived another one of these dreadful winters and i can put away the grim thoughts for at least six month.

Hmmm, blogging? Lets give it a try.

Do I really want put myself out there?
Should I really share my life with other people I don´t know?

Why not, maybe I´ll get myself a nice stalker that way.